Thursday, August 29, 2002

I had this one out in the barn. Everytime I tried to start on this canvas, the lady looked so angry, intimidating me, don't you dare! I finally brought her in, washed her face and plopped her on the easel. But she wouldn't talk to me, she just sulked. To get the process going, I placed an ill-fitting lobster claw on her head from the previous nights dinner - clearly an insult! What do you say now!

Nothing.

I traced my hand onto the painting and tried to reproduce it best I could. The hand was too big for her. Fury barely contained, she still wouldn't talk. Nancy came over with Kip and Schuyler for dinner. I flashed the painting at Nancy, and finally, lobster lady spoke. But not to me. To Nancy!

She said, tell him to "Stop! In the name of the Lobster!"

I added a few more things, and, try as i might to keep religion out, a little stigmata crept in, shaped like a fish skeleton.



To bid on this painting, go here.

posted by Eddie 8/29/2002 06:58:54 AM

Wednesday, August 28, 2002

I painted this on a piece of tree fungus art while driving between Boston and Hartford, Mrs. Breen at the wheel. I kept showing it through the window to passing motorists while Mrs. Breen would slap me on the side of my head. I know it looks kinda like me because Little Breen, kept giggling, pointing and saying Daddy! I completely painted over the original as the fungus texture looked kind of like my flesh gets when I go to Florida and eat too much fried food.

BEFORE BREENING



AFTER BREENING



If you want to bid on this fungus go here.

posted by Eddie 8/28/2002 01:43:08 PM

Tuesday, August 27, 2002

We were having dinner with some friends at their house a week ago getting a little toasty and talking about religion as usual. One guest admitted to singing in the church choir which we all kinda smirked at and generously pitied him, we smug psuedo-intellectuals in our cups. Roger says his son heard Grandpa swear and pointed and said 'he said cheesus!'Another dinner party breen was born! It's not a good party if I can't mine the guests for at least one good idea! Text says,'Cheesus said eat of my flesh!' and "...Drink of my blood was added by vampires!"



If you want this painting, go here.

posted by Eddie 8/27/2002 03:33:28 AM

Monday, August 26, 2002

Mrs. Breen brought this big-eyed painting home from the flea-market last week and i thought it looked like my first girl friend Berta. 6th grade. I was nutty about her and we would wrestle in her room, no kissing or anything, but i wanted to. I moved away in 7th grade and always figured that she became a nun, but that doesn't really have anything to do with this painting. This is a classic religion versus science thing, mixing them up since science is sort of a religion too. Text says, While Berta prayed to her imaginary friend...scientists claimed the universe started from nothing! Cyclops Einstein says Magic numbers and letters explain most of it!Jesus leans on a cross with Christmas presents nailed to it while a freakish half easter bunny half santa creature lurks nearby.

posted by Eddie 8/26/2002 04:05:54 AM