Our house is full of breens in one tiny room, covering all the walls like
wallpaper, and the rest of the house is barren, breenless! There is alot of
Catholic, religous art around, some santos, swestern stuff, why not my breens?
Why not my goddam BREENS! The person who emails me the most cogent
argument for influencing my wife to allow me to hang my art in the house will be
sent an unworn Eddie Breen T-shirt! Her arguments against hanging breens in the
house are: 1.Her mother will see them and take offense. 2.Our friends or clients
will see, and realize that the art was made by me. 3.Our neighbors will think we're
weirder than they already do. 4.It's not REAL art.(She went to art school and
while she gets a chuckle out of this stuff, she is secretly resentful that I just
picked up a paintbrush a couple of years ago and went at it, becoming wildly
successful.) You have to keep the arguments reasonable and nice to be
persuasive - in fact, forget #4. I'm usually always in hot water for something,
mainly my innate laziness, and I don't want things to escalate.
Below are entries received so far........-
From Jeff and Leslie:
1. Makes excellent Jehovah's witness/Mormon missionary repellent
2. Soon you will not be able to afford to insure your work hanging in
your home, so you better do it now while you still can.
3. It's MUCH better than hanging the pre-Breened pieces.
4. Anyone who is offended or frightened,
a. is a tasteless git and
b. will shut up when you tell them how much they sell for.
5. You can always lie to people and tell them they are Howard Finsters.
(If they believe you it will prove that they are tasteless gits)
From: The Bad One
I'm a wife myself. And since your art is not only a meaningful source of
income but something that you pour your heart into, as your wife and life
partner, she should show her support for you by embracing (not denying! oh
no!) your lovely works.
In return, you should let her choose which paintings to hang and where
they should go. And she should be able to take them down whenever the Pope
comes to visit (although the man's nearly dead and surely can't see past
the end of his nose).
How horrible it will look in your biography (which will surely be written
when you go to a better place) that your wife disapproved of your artwork
and restricted it to one room of the house when it was OBVIOUSLY
MASTERFUL. Art historians will click their tongues disapprovingly, and
mothers everywhere will tell their daughters, "Don't be a Mrs. Breen."
FROM BILLIE:
I think that your wife should let you hang your art in your home because
she loves you, no other reason. Look at it from a mother's point of
view, you put the kids pictures on the fridge, let the husband hang his
pictures on the walls. I remain proud of my kids artwork today and I
have only one left in school
From Cheryl:
You don't look lazy to me, you seem to be very busy doing interesting and
strange things to other people's art. Since you seem to be obsessed with the
devil, perhaps that is why your wife objects to your paintings. Perhaps
she'd like another subject better than satan! It's just a thought!
From Nancy:
All is art. Art is in the eye of the beholder. A lump of clay can be just
that, a lump of clay or a piece of artwork waiting to be created. Nothing in
nature is perfect, there are no straight lines so who is to say your Breen's
aren't art. A little crippled child is just as beautiful if not more so
beautiful in God's eye so who's to say your Breen's aren't just like that,
little cripple art works that need love and admiration just as much if not
more so than a Monet or Renoir. And just who is to say your Breen's aren't
artwork. Have you actually seen some of those Picasso's?!!
From James:
The only reason I can think of for your wife allowing your paintings to hang in the house is:
This will give her a convient source for her own paintings to paint over. No more garage sales, or flea
market trips for her. She can stay at home and the time she saves can be spent on painting "Mrs.Breens".
Just think about it "born again Breens".
This should also take care of her stated objections to the Breens hanging in your house.
1.Her mother will see them and realize they will soon be transformed into "Mrs.Breens" and be thrilled.
2. Your friends and clients will see the "Mrs.Breens" and realize that the art wasn't made by you.
3.The neighbors will think that anyone with such great art work can't really be that weird.
4.It really will be art.
In conclusion can't you already hear the cash registers at e-bay ringing up sales!
Seriously, I enjoyed visiting your site, good luck.
James
From: Kristen
I think that you should be able to hang your paintings in your house! I think that a talent is a
talent and it should be appreciated, and treasured.. There are many things that people find
offensive.. I might be offended by all the religious art that is in your house. See, you can't do
anything without offending someone. Also, by not letting you hang your paintings, it just shows that
she is resentful, not because it's not art, but because you are successful. Anything that you use to
express yourself is art, it doesn't have to be beautiful. I know that if I had a significant other
who had such a talent, I couldn't get enough of his/her work. It maybe funny, but it's part of you.
When your wife says those things about your painting, she is saying them about you.. Hopefully she
wouldn't want to say something to you like that.. I'm sure that your neighbors would appreciate your
art, and not consider you weird. If she is an artist, than she should have the desire to let everyone
see her work... I think that is th
From: Kris
Sorry so late on this, and I already have a waaaay cool Breen tee from the
name the sacred organ contest so this is offered as merely friendly advice.
#1 I'm afraid she's got you on this one. You have a kid right? You MUST
maintain a friendly relationship with Grandma. Period. She will likely pass
away before you then you can do whatever you want. My Mom HATES my Jack
Kevorkian Into the Abyss painting-and even I admit it is pretty ugly (it's
supposed to be tho...) but it does not *overtly* offend her religious
sensibilities so I leave it up. For now your subversion must manifest itself
in a more subtle way. Religion is just too sensitive an issue to fuck with.
#2 and #3 Ridiculous. Screw them.
My solution? Simple. Mount a Breen back to back behind all the existing
pictures in your house. You can flip them around to the other stuff when
sensitive company is expected--and YOU will know they are always there
regardless of which way they are turned, right?
Hope it helps!
From: Billie
I think that your wife should let you hang your art in your home because
she loves you, no other reason. Look at it from a mother's point of
view, you put the kids pictures on the fridge, let the husband hang his
pictures on the walls. I remain proud of my kids artwork today and I
have only one left in school.
From Kevin:
"Love me, love my art!"
"Honey, the shock of going from a BREEN-free zone (the rest of the house)
into the BREEN-room is not healthy. We really need to have them sprinkled
throughout the house for my health."
"Honey, don't you remember what happened in Ghostbusters when all the evil
was concentrated in one place? The containment vessel exploded...releasing
demon spirits throughout the city!"
"Honey, BREENS are taking the world by storm, unless I get some of these up
on our walls, we will be the last in the neighborhood to get a BREEN!"
"Honey, your mother is my secret idea person. She *invented* heaven juice!
Flame people, flying eyes, green alien children......ALL HER!"
From Scott-
Its simple eddie, tell your wife that hanging your painting is an example of what art isn't. no one will know for
sure your wife will be appeased-she was right all along- and your painting will get hung. thank you id reallylike something i can hang on my wall instead of a t shirt for my extreme brilliance- no dead cats please.
From Lynn-
To Eddie's Long-suffering Wife-
As to why Eddie should be allowed to hang his Breens in the house:
1. It's cheap advertisement for his work.
2. It lives up to the adage "Good art won't match the sofa".
3. It effectively lets you know who your friends really are...
(all others will be fleeing the premises).
4. If it's a deterent to your Mom; then Eddie should spring for an all-
expenses paid vacation for you and your Mom to any place you want to go
(plus spending money...for BOTH of you); 1 trip a year per wall in
perpetuity OR until Eddie opts for other decorations...
5. It will stop his whining on this subject.
6. He'll owe you...BIG TIME.
From: Dorothy
G`day Eddie !
I have just had my very first Eddie Breen experiance. First thought....Andy Warhol of the 2000`s ! Second thought...I like the fact that you think about what you`re painting, the reason for.
I`m not sure if I fully appreciate your art style just yet. As with any art style, one has to be exposed fully to understand and appreciate what we see....and I hope to do so in the days to come.
The question was: why should your wife hang your art around your cave?....I`m not sure of her total reasons, but ...maybe if you did some paintings to go with the colour of the decore, maybe she`d consider it? Does she realize that she`d have what a bunch of us would like to have hanging on our walls ?
I wish you all the best now and in the future! I will now be very interested in your work and future endevors! Have you ever brought your work to Toronto? If not, would you consider It?
From Judy:
Dear Eddie,
I am a bit puzzled by the apparent contradictions in your situation. You have finally created something that your wife wants to keep, and therefore, presumably display somewhere in your house. So naturally you want to sell it for a lot of money to ease her disappointment at the loss of this painting. Wouldn't it be simpler to let her have the painting she likes? Then she hangs it in the house, and suddenly the concerns about explaining your art to everybody are irrelevant.
Am I missing something? Are you trying to prove how legitimate 'piggyback' art is by selling it for more money? Will more money convince your wife that your art is worthy of public airing?
Here's another tack: have you asked her to collaborate (after all she did go to art school and she does have enough of a sense of humor to keep you around)? So many wallflowers would love to join the dance, if only they were asked. Would she?
You mention clients coming to the house - are they yours or your wife's? If yours and you're willing to put the regular business at risk, what the hay? If they're your wife's clients, perhaps you need to settle for breens in the private parts of the house?